This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
