actually, I'm a sock model
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
