That's intense
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
