I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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