I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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