That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
