Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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