i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize