yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
if only i could text you this smell
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
