I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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