3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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