we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
