To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
