Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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