I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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