I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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