ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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