hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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