No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
