I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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