six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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