You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
