yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
