Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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