the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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