3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
