I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize