You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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