We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
