Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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