So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
