Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
too bad you live with your parents still
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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