i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
