I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
We are all done wearing pants today
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
