Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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