great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i think i have two assholes
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
