Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Randomize
