Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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