I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
You dont lie about slip and slides
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
