Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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