Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
