Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
