Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
