32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Randomize
