it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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