I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I could have mohawked her pubes.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
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