I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
What drink are we having for lunch?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize