if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
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