Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
