why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
